Extreme emotional distress. I should sue the company.

As my regular morning ritual, I was trying to establish the location of Fairycakes yesterday and I couldn’t get him on outlook! Imagine my distress. I though it was just a computer glitch causing him to be obliterated from the company memory, but I was unreasonably distressed. I felt sick and anxious and unable to eat – so unlike me.

After some discussion with the gals, we thought it was probably a mistake, but weird none the less. After my meeting I actually went to see his secretary and ask her. She said, predictable enough in retrospect, that he was just offsite for the day.

However, my social network tells me otherwise. I actually sent him an email and got an automated response that was not at all like the other one I got (which included his cell number). This one just said I’ll get back to you when I can, leave a message with my assistant. Very different tone. And the feelers we put out have been gathering some disturbing vibes. C’s boss was talking about it totally unprovoked. Too much of a coincidence for me.

Oh, and his company cell phone isn’t working. They’ve cut the umbilical cord.

If indeed he was sacked and he did tell his sec, why would she confirm it to me? Of course it would have to come through the “official” channels. I am so self delusional, I just hear what I want to hear.

In short, I think he’s gone. And I’m very sad.

B thinks it’s good as now I can ask him out and he can say yes. Except I don’t know how to get in touch with him short of going through his assistant, which seems so… uncertain. I want to speak to him, or at least be able to leave him a message I know he’ll get. (Control issues, anyone?)

Oh, what was I thinking? If he is the FC in the book, I can call him directly. I shall have to try that tonight. Stalking? No, just good intelligence gathering.

Sad sad sad. Now what gives me a reason to come to work? The occasional visits from JQ? (who BTW is hot hot hot for me. Must be the hormone vibe. I had to beat them off with a stick yesterday.) I like him but I’m so over the casual bonking at lunch scenario, at least with him. I’d take anything I could get with FC.

I’m a freak.

Update: OK, so now he’s back on the list! WTF???? I can’t take this. I am amazingly lighthearted, though. How much would it suck being fired even if you do have more money than god and are old as the hills and ready to retire?

So why do I want to go out with a dude who’s 60, smokes and probably dyes his hair? Very good f-ing question. Because I’m obsessed and obsession has no rhyme or reason.

I’m wearing my new shoes tomorrow! I looooooooooooooooove them with the passion of a thousand white hot suns.

On a more mundane note , I finished Jack’s socks last night at the PP and wound the Indigo Moon for socks for ME! Finally. Can’t decide whether to do a cable pattern or a leafy pattern that would go with the green colour… decisions decisions. I’ll probably go with the leafy thing as then I can knit mostly instead of having all those purl sections which drive me mad. And I’d have to knit “normally” so my gauge would be way tight.

Party Friday night at the Purl. Woo hoo! Bring on the te kill ya. (Interestingly, they called me Tequila Lise when I walked in last night. I can only imagine the conversations that went on without me. Really, I was hardly drunk at all. I swear.)